I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.
~quote about Funny Saying by Joan Rivers
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~quotes on Television by Malcolm Muggeridge The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
~sayings on Driving by Noelie Altito Living at risk is jumping off the cliff and building your wings on the way down.
~quotations on Risk by Ray Bradbury Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself.
~daily inspirational quote by Dick Cavett Baseball and football are very different games. In a way, both of them are easy. Football is easy if you're crazy as hell. Baseball is easy if you've got patience. They'd both be easier for me if I were a little more crazy - and a little more patient.
~saying about daily by Bo Jackson
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~quote about Sisters by Linda Sunshine Dare to do things worthy of imprisonment if you mean to be of consequence.
~quotes on Civil Disobedience by Juvenal (Decimus Junius Juvenalis) Chastity: The most unnatural of the sexual perversions.
~sayings on Sex by Aldous Huxley, Eyeless in Gaza, 1936 Every improvement in communication makes the bore more terrible.
~quotations on Bores by Frank Moore Colby Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.
~daily inspirational quote by Friedrich Nietzsche If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.
~saying about daily by Dave Barry Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.
~quote about Career by Albert Einstein Death row is a state of mind
~quotes on Death by Doris Ann Foster You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back
~sayings on Mothers Day by William D. Tammeus I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
~quotations on Humor by Oscar Wilde Only as high as I reach can I grow Only as far as I seek can I go, Only as deep as I look can I see, Only as much as I dream can I be
~daily inspirational quote by Karen Ravn Live in rooms full of light.
~saying about daily by Cornelius Celsus [A] final comfort that is small, but not cold: The heart is the only broken instrument that works.
~quote about Heartache by T.E. Kalem Each of us is something of a schizophrenic personality, tragically divided against ourselves.
~quotes on Self by Martin Luther King, Jr., Strength to Love, 1963 A horse is dangerous at both ends and uncomfortable in the middle.
~sayings on Horses by Ian Fleming New York is to the nation what the white church spire is to the village - the visible symbol of aspiration and faith, the white plume saying the way is up!
~quotations on Places by E.B. White But mathematics is the sister, as well as the servant, of the arts and is touched with the same madness and genius.
~daily inspirational quote by Harold Marston Morse Come live in my heart and pay no rent.
~saying about daily by Samuel Lover I don't think it is so much the actual bath that most cats dislike; I think it's the fact that they have to spend a good part of the day putting their hair back in place.
~quote about Cats by Debbie Peterson Don't laugh at a youth for his affectations; he is only trying on one face after another to find a face of his own.
~quotes on Teenagers by Logan Pearsall Smith, Age and Death, Afterthoughts, 1931 It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.
~sayings on Food by Lewis Grizzard A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie
~quotations on Mothers Day by Tenneva Jordan Books serve to show a man that those original thoughts of his aren't very new after all.
~daily inspirational quote by Abraham Lincoln Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
~saying about daily by Minnie Pearl You can tell more about a person by what he says about others than you can by what others say about him.
~quote about Wise Words by Leo Aikman Take away the right to say fuck and you take away the right to say fuck the government.
~quotes on Censorship by Lenny Bruce If wisdom and diamonds grew on the same tree we could soon tell how much men loved wisdom.
~sayings on Wisdom by Lemuel K. Washburn, Is The Bible Worth Reading And Other Essays, 1911 I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart. I am. I am. I am.
~quotations on Self by Sylvia Plath If the Lord loveth a cheerful giver, how he must hate the taxpayer!
~daily inspirational quote by John Andrew Holmes We get lost in a fog of abstractions and easily forget that man is a bloodhound sniffing out the real.
~saying about daily by Robert C. Pollock The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.
~quote about War by George Patton Sex is emotion in motion.
~quotes on Sex by Mae West
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