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ass quotes for your Self help needs

   We spend our days in deliberating, and we end them without coming to any resolve.
 ~quote about Thinking by L'Estrange
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   Where there is no vision, people perish.
 ~quotes on Career by Emerson

   Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it.
 ~sayings on American football by Heywood Hale Brown

   Nothing travels faster than light, with the possible exception of bad news, which follows its own rules.
 ~quotations on Light by Douglas Adams

   Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark.
 ~funny ass quotes by George Iles

   Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there someday.
 ~saying about ass by A.A. Milne
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   Many politicians are in the habit of laying it down as a self-evident proposition that no people ought to be free till they are fit to use their freedom. The maxim is worthy of the fool in the old story who resolved not to go into the water till he had learned to swim.
 ~quote about Freedom by Thomas Macaulay

   Women may be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake whole relationships
 ~quotes on Women's Greetings by James Shubert

   The sooner I fall behind, the more time I have to catch up.
 ~sayings on Procrastination by Author Unknown

   I am beautiful as I am. I am the shape that was gifted. My breasts are no longer perky and upright like when I was a teenager. My hips are wider than that of a fashion model's. For this I am glad, for these are the signs of a life lived.
 ~quotations on Feminism by Cindy Olsen, co-owner of The Body Objective

   The prerequisite for making love is to like someone enormously
 ~funny ass quotes by Helen Gurley Brown

   God, that dumping ground of our dreams.
 ~saying about ass by Jean Rostand, Carnets d'un Biologiste, 1962

   When one has one's hand full of truth it is not always wise to open it.
 ~quote about Truth by French Proverb

   Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls
 ~quotes on Love Quotes by Mother Teresa

   Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and fans the bonfire.
 ~sayings on Love by François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

   Why are sex and violence always linked? I'm afraid they'll blur together in people's minds - sexandviolence - until we can't tell them apart. I expect to hear a newscaster say, The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex.
 ~quotations on Violence by Dick Cavett, 1978

   The joy of music should never be interrupted by a commercial.
 ~funny ass quotes by Leonard Bernstein

   The reward for conformity was that everyone liked you except yourself.
 ~saying about ass by Rita Mae Brown, Venus Envy

   Could life so end, half told; its school so fail? Soul, soul, there is a sequel to thy tale!
 ~quote about Easter by Robert Mowry Bell

   There is no need to reach high for the starsThey are already within you - just reach deep into yourself!
 ~quotes on Graduation by The Quote Garden

   I have a wife, I have sons: all of them hostages given to fate.
 ~sayings on Fate by Lucan

   The highest of all arts, and the most rewarding, is the art of living.
 ~quotations on Living by

   Better the occasional faults of a government that lives in a spirit of charity than the consistent omissions of a government frozen in the ice of its own indifference.
 ~funny ass quotes by Franklin D. Roosevelt

   Though boys throw stones at frogs in sport, the frogs do not die in sport, but in earnest.
 ~saying about ass by Bion, Water and Land Animals, Plutarch

   The law embodies the story of a nation's development through many centuries, and it cannot be dealt with as if it contained only the axioms and corollaries of a book of mathematics.
 ~quote about Justice by Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr., The Common Law

   The belly rules the mind.
 ~quotes on Food by Spanish Proverb

   Enduring habits I hate.... Yes, at the very bottom of my soul I feel grateful to all my misery and bouts of sickness and everything about me that is imperfect, because this sort of thing leaves me with a hundred backdoors through which I can escape from enduring habits.
 ~sayings on Habits by Friedrich Nietzsche, The Gay Science, 1882

   They are sick that surfeit with too much, as they that starve with nothing.
 ~quotations on Golden Mean by William Shakespeare

   Hope is some extraordinary spiritual grace that God gives us to control our fears, not to oust them.
 ~funny ass quotes by Vincent McNabb

   In a real dark night of the soul, it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day.
 ~saying about ass by F. Scott Fitzgerald

   What a weird thing smoking is and I can't stop it. I feel cosy, have a sense of well-being when I'm smoking, poisoning myself, killing myself slowly. Not so slowly maybe. I have all kinds of pains I don't want to know about and I know that's what they're from. But when I don't smoke I scarcely feel as if I'm living. I don't feel as if I'm living unless I'm killing myself.
 ~quote about Smoking by Russell Hoban, Turtle Diary, 1975

   They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
 ~quotes on Women by Author Unknown

   In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.
 ~sayings on Gratitude by H.L. Mencken

   It is hard to convince a high-school student that he will encounter a lot of problems more difficult than those of algebra and geometry.
 ~quotations on Teenagers by Edgar W. Howe

   Nothing seems to please a fly so much as to be taken for a currant; and if it can be baked in a cake and palmed off on the unwary, it dies happy.
 ~funny ass quotes by Mark Twain

   The PC [political correctness] movement exists not in order to improve the well-being of those whose oppression it purports to combat. Rather, its purpose is to wrap its proponents in a kind of verbal comfort-blanket. Beneath its complacent cosiness and nauseating sanctimony, the intrepid shock-troops of 'populist authoritarianism' pretend that suppressing the language of prejudice is the same as eliminating prejudice itself. Smug and self-satisfied, having assuaged whatever guilt they may have felt through their attacks on the 'non-PC', they ignore the real inequalities, ignominies and powerlessness of those whom they pretend to champion. They are instead complacently content at their 'victory' in contorting the language of 'acceptable' discourse in the classroom, in the textbook and in the mass media.
 ~saying about ass by Erik Kowal, as posted on The Wordwizard Portal

   Let men tremble to win the hand of woman, unless they win along with it the utmost passion of her heart! Else it may be their miserable fortune, when some mightier touch than their own may have awakened all her sensibilities, to be reproached even for the calm content, the marble image of happiness, which they will have imposed upon her as the warm reality.
 ~quote about Passion by Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter

   Journalism is the ability to meet the challenge of filling space.
 ~quotes on Media Journalism by Rebecca West
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