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ass quotes for your Self help needs

   All change is not growth, as all movement is not forward.
 ~quote about Changes by Ellen Glasgow

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   Liberalism is trust of the people tempered by prudence. Conservatism is distrust of the people tempered by fear.
 ~quotes on Trust by William E. Gladstone, 1866

   Courage is almost a contradiction in terms. It means a strong desire to live taking the form of readiness to die.
 ~sayings on Courage by G.K. Chesterton

   Why Mr. Summers, don't you know that the spitter has been outlawed for years? How would I ever learn to throw one?
 ~quotations on Baseball by Thomas Jefferson

   Philo began laying out his vision for what television could become. Above all else... television would become the world's greatest teaching tool. Illiteracy would be wiped out. The immediacy of television was the key. As news happened viewers would watch it unfold live; no longer would we have to rely on people interpreting and distorting the news for us. We would be watching sporting events and symphony orchestras. Instead of going to the movies, the movies would come to us. Television would also bring about world peace. If we were able to see people in other countries and learn about our differences, why would there be any misunderstandings? War would be a thing of the past.
 ~funny ass quotes by Evan I. Schwartz, The Last Lone Inventor, about Philo T. Farnsworth, the inventor of television

   Learn to... be what you are, and learn to resign with a good grace all that you are not.
 ~saying about ass by Henri Frederic Amiel

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   I met a lot of people in Europe. I even encountered myself.
 ~quote about Self-Discovery by James Baldwin

   Legend: A lie that has attained the dignity of age.
 ~quotes on History by H.L. Mencken<

   Any man can hold a girl's hand, but only the elite can hold her feet.
 ~sayings on Cheerleading by Author Unknown

   A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion.
 ~quotations on Medical by Martin H. Fischer

   My play was a complete success. The audience was a failure.
 ~funny ass quotes by Ashleigh Brilliant

   I'd rather play in front of a full house than an empty crowd
 ~saying about ass by Johnny Giles

   A writer's mind seems to be situated partly in the solar plexus and partly in the head.
 ~quote about Writing by Ethel Wilson

   Happy We-Stole-Your-Land-and-Killed-Your-People Day!
 ~quotes on Thanksgiving Day by Thanksgiving toast, from the movie Sweet November

   Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them
 ~sayings on Earth Day by Bill Vaughn, quoted in Jon Winokur, The Portable Curmudgeon, 1987

   Love one another and you will be happyIt's as simple and as difficult as that
 ~quotations on I Love You by Michael Leunig

   Never part without loving words to think of during your absenceIt may be that you will not meet again in this life
 ~funny ass quotes by Jean Paul Richter

   It is the job of poetry to clean up our word-clogged reality by creating silences around things.
 ~saying about ass by Stephen Mallarme

   Do not follow where the path may leadGo, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail
 ~quote about Graduation by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   Everyone must take time to sit and watch the leaves turn.
 ~quotes on Autumn by Elizabeth Lawrence

   You can see a lot by just looking.
 ~sayings on Philosophical by Yogi Berra

   The cat is the animal to whom the Creator gave the biggest eye, the softest fur, the most supremely delicate nostrils, a mobile ear, an unrivaled paw and a curved claw borrowed from the rose-tree.
 ~quotations on Cats by Colette

   Scrapbooking is cheaper than a therapist.
 ~funny ass quotes by Author Unknown

   I talk to him when I'm lonesome like; and I'm sure he understands. When he looks at me so attentively, and gently licks my hands; then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes, but I never say naught thereat. For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes, but never a friend like that.
 ~saying about ass by W. Dayton Wedgefarth

   Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet.
 ~quote about Cats by Colette

   It well becomes a man who is no longer young to forget that he ever was.
 ~quotes on Age by Seigneur de Saint-Evremond, 1696

   Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.
 ~sayings on Friendship by Sicilian Proverb

   In passing, also, I would like to say that the first time Adam had a chance he laid the blame on woman.
 ~quotations on Women by Nancy Astor, My Two Countries

   Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.
 ~funny ass quotes by Steve Bluestone

   Books - the best antidote against the marsh-gas of boredom and vacuity.
 ~saying about ass by George Steiner

   There's a bit of magic in everything, and some loss to even things out
 ~quote about Adversity by Lou Reed, "Magic and Loss"

   Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted.
 ~quotes on Attitude by Aldous Huxley

   The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.
 ~sayings on Attitude by Robert M. Pirsig

   Why do people give each other flowers? To celebrate various important occasions, they're killing living creatures? Why restrict it to plants? Sweetheart, let's make up. Have this deceased squirrel.
 ~quotations on Environment by The Washington Post

   Just give me 25 guys on the last year of their contracts; I'll win a pennant every year.
 ~funny ass quotes by Sparky Anderson

   Making the decision to have a child is momentousIt is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body
 ~saying about ass by Elizabeth Stone

   You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with
 ~quote about I Love You by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

   The eloquent man is he who is no beautiful speaker, but who is inwardly and desperately drunk with a certain belief.
 ~quotes on Belief by Ralph Waldo Emerson

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