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dirty quotes for your Self help needs

   If you can't write your idea on the back of my calling card, you don't have a clear idea.
 ~quote about Brevity by David Belasco

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   A college education shows a man how little other people know.
 ~quotes on College by Thomas Chandler Haliburton

   Why attack God? He may be as miserable as we are.
 ~sayings on God by Erik Satie

   Each man must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong, which course is patriotic and which isn't. You cannot shirk this and be a man. To decide against your conviction is to be an unqualified and excusable traitor, both to yourself and to your country, let men label you as they may.
 ~quotations on Patriotism by Mark Twain

   Hope is like a road in the country; there was never a road, but when many people walk on it, the road comes into existence.
 ~funny dirty quote by Lin Yutang

   This nice and subtle happiness of reading, this joy not chilled by age, this polite and unpunished vice, this selfish, serene life-long intoxication.
 ~saying about dirty by Logan Pearsall Smith

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   The darkest hour has only sixty minutes.
 ~quote about Adversity by Morris Mandel

   A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it.
 ~quotes on Love by Frank A. Clark

   I am fully conscious of the fact, that aphorisms are like wandering Gypsies. They must always be published without guarantee of the authenticity.
 ~sayings on Quotations by Erkki Melartin

   The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble shoots back
 ~quotations on Adversity by Author Unknown

   I envy people who drink - at least they know what to blame everything on.
 ~funny dirty quote by Oscar Levant

   What was most significant about the lunar voyage was not that men set foot on the moon but that they set eye on the earth.
 ~saying about dirty by Norman Cousins

   Any man can be a father. It takes someone special to be a dad.
 ~quote about Fathers by Author Unknown

   The smallest bookstore still contains more ideas of worth than have been presented in the entire history of television.
 ~quotes on Books Reading by Andrew Ross

   I loathed the game, and since I could see no pleasure or usefulness in it, it was very difficult for me to show courage at it. Football, it seemed to me, is not really played for the pleasure of kicking a ball about, but is a species of fighting.
 ~sayings on Soccer by George Orwell, Such, Such Were the Joys

   I can understand people simply fleeing the mountainous effort Christmas has become... but there are always a few saving graces and finally they make up for all the bother and distress
 ~quotations on Christmas by May Sarton

   You have come into a hard worldI know of only one easy place in it, and that is the grave
 ~funny dirty quote by Henry Ward Beecher

   Idealism is what precedes experience; cynicism is what follows.
 ~saying about dirty by David T. Wolf

   Pleasure is the flower that passes; remembrance, the lasting perfume.
 ~quote about Pleasure by Jean de Boufflers

   I can give you 1040 good reasons why I hate the government.
 ~quotes on Taxes by Terri Guillemets

   Envy is ignorance.
 ~sayings on Jealousy by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   We are too busy mopping the floor to turn off the faucet.
 ~quotations on Goals by Author Unknown

   Books have to be read (worse luck it takes so long a time). It is the only way of discovering what they contain. A few savage tribes eat them, but reading is the only method of assimilation revealed to the West.
 ~funny dirty quote by E.M. Forster

   You know you're an Arizona native when... a rainy day puts you in a good mood.
 ~saying about dirty by Marshall Trimble, quoted in You Know You're an Arizona Native, When... compiled by Don Dedera, 1993

   Women know not the whole of their coquetry.
 ~quote about Flirtation by François Duc de la Rochefoucauld, Maxims

   As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them
 ~quotes on Thanksgiving Day by John Fitzgerald Kennedy

   Good for the body is the work of the body, good for the soul the work of the soul, and good for either the work of the other.
 ~sayings on Soul by Henry David Thoreau

   It doesn't make much difference what you study, as long as you don't like it.
 ~quotations on School by Finley Peter Dunne

   Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote.
 ~funny dirty quote by Paul Harvey

   May the sun in his course visit no land more free, more happy, more lovely, than this our own country!
 ~saying about dirty by Daniel Webster

   The only man I know who behaves sensibly is my tailor; he takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them.
 ~quote about Conformity by George Bernard Shaw

   Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
 ~quotes on Grandparents by Andy Rooney

   Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
 ~sayings on Famous Saying by Irving Kristol

   In winter I get up at night,And dress by yellow candle-light.In summer quite the other way,I have to go to bed by day.,
 ~quotations on Summer by Robert Louis Stevenson

   When suffering comes, we yearn for some sign from God, forgetting we have just had one.
 ~funny dirty quote by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.
 ~saying about dirty by Mark Twain

   If you smile at someone, they might smile back.
 ~quote about Smiles by Author Unknown

   A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
 ~quotes on Politics by Texas Guinan

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