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hilarious quotes for your Self help needs

   Democracy gives every man the right to be his own oppressor
 ~quote about Election Day by James Russell Lowell

   If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might tell them sorrows know how to swim.
 ~quotes on Adversity by Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

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   The tragedy of sexual intercourse is the perpetual virginity of the soul.
 ~sayings on Sex by William B. Yeats

   The reputation of a thousand years may be determined by the conduct of one hour.
 ~quotations on Integrity by Japanese Proverb

   I think that if ever a mortal heard the voice of God it would be in a garden at the cool of the day.
 ~funny hilarious quote by F. Frankfort Moore, A Garden of Peace

   Do not plan for ventures before finishing what's at hand.
 ~saying about hilarious by Euripides

   Family quarrels are bitter things. They don't go by any rules. They're not like aches or wounds; they're more like splits in the skin that won't heal because there's not enough material.
 ~quote about Family by F. Scott Fitzgerald

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   It's a good thing I stayed in Cincinnati for four years -- It took me that long to learn how to spell it
 ~quotes on Baseball by Rocky Bridges

   Don't park in the spaces marked, Reserved for Umpires.
 ~sayings on Baseball by John McSherry

   Opportunities are never lost; someone will take the one you miss.
 ~quotations on Opportunities by Author Unknown

   The only thing that has to be finished by next Tuesday is next Monday.
 ~funny hilarious quote by Jennifer Yane

   The human story does not always unfold like a mathematical calculation on the principle that two and two make four. Sometimes in life they make five or minus three; and sometimes the blackboard topples down in the middle of the sum and leaves the class in disorder and the pedagogue with a black eye.
 ~saying about hilarious by Winston Churchill

   Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.
 ~quote about Imagination by George Smith Patton, War as I Knew It, 1947

   A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.
 ~quotes on Travel by Lao Tzu

   Newspapers: dead trees with information smeared on them.
 ~sayings on Media Journalism by Horizon, Electronic Frontier

   Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea.
 ~quotations on Tea by Author Unknown

   Freedom is never free
 ~funny hilarious quote by Author Unknown

   Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself.
 ~saying about hilarious by William Faulkner

   We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin.
 ~quote about Being Yourself by André Berthiaume, Contretemps

   Belief in God? An afterlife? I believe in rock: this apodictic rock beneath my feet.
 ~quotes on Reality by Edward Abbey

   Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you
 ~sayings on Cool by Langston Hughes

   The Lord's Prayer may be committed to memory quickly, but it is slowly learnt by heart.
 ~quotations on Prayer by Frederick Denison Maurice

   What we are speaks so loudly it drowns out what we say.
 ~funny hilarious quote by

   The least initial deviation from the truth is multiplied later a thousandfold.
 ~saying about hilarious by Aristotle

   We should look for someone to eat and drink with before looking for something to eat and drink...
 ~quote about Food by Epicurus

   In its broadest ecological context, economic development is the development of more intensive ways of exploiting the natural environment.
 ~quotes on Prosperity by Richard Wilkinson

   A man's dreams are an index to his greatness
 ~sayings on Dreams by Zadok Rabinwitz

   If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change.
 ~quotations on Adversity by John A. Simone, Sr.

   You have just dined, and however scrupulously the slaughterhouse is concealed in the graceful distance of miles, there is complicity.
 ~funny hilarious quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted.
 ~saying about hilarious by Johann Paul Friedrich Richter, Flower, Fruit, and Thorn

   A library, to modify the famous metaphor of Socrates, should be the delivery room for the birth of ideas-a place where history comes to life
 ~quote about Books by Norman Cousins

   Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss, events happening; small minds, people things.
 ~quotes on Self Improvement by

   When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
 ~sayings on Very True by The Airplane Law

   The man who doesn’t need a boss is usually selected to be one.
 ~quotations on Career by

   I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.
 ~funny hilarious quote by Lyndon B. Johnson

   Hardly a name in profane history is more august than hisHardly another character in the world's record has made so little of its opportunitiesHis discovery was a blunder; his blunder was a new world; the New World is his monument!
 ~saying about hilarious by Justin Winsor

   It must be admitted that there are some parts of the soul which we must entirely paralyze before we can live happily in this world.
 ~quote about Curmudgeons by Sébastien-Roch Nicolas de Chamfort

   There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
 ~quotes on Self-Discovery by Anaïs Nin

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