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hilarious quotes for your Self help needs

   It's far easier to forgive an enemy after you've got even with him.
 ~quote about Forgiveness by Olin Miller
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   Liberalism is, I think, resurgent. One reason is that more and more people are so painfully aware of the alternative.
 ~quotes on Politics by John Kenneth Galbraith, New York Times, 8 October 1989

   Clearly, then, the city is not a concrete jungle, it is a human zoo.
 ~sayings on Cities by Desmond Morris, The Human Zoo

   Your schooling may be over, but remember that your education still continues
 ~quotations on Graduation by Author Unknown

   Malice drinks one-half of its own poison.
 ~funny hilarious quotes by Seneca

   Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.
 ~saying about hilarious by Jean Kerr, The Snake Has All the Lines, 1960
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   The best time to tell someone that you love him or her is before somebody else does. JUST DO IT, NOW!
 ~quote about Love by

   The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet.
 ~quotes on Funny Saying by Oliver Herford

   As the bus slowed down at the crowded bus stop, the Pakistani bus conductor leaned from the platform and called out, Six only! The bus stopped. He counted on six passengers, rang the bell, and then, as the bus moved off, called to those left behind: So sorry, plenty of room in my heart - but the bus is full. He left behind a row of smiling faces. It's not what you do, it's the way that you do it.
 ~sayings on Kindness by The Friendship Book of Francis Gay, 1977

   Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.
 ~quotations on God by Garth Brooks

   I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones.
 ~funny hilarious quotes by John Peel

   Dyspepsia is the remorse of a guilty stomach.
 ~saying about hilarious by A. Kerr

   The darkest day in our lives is when we plan to get money without working.
 ~quote about Financial by

   Care I for the limb, the thews, the stature, bulk, and big assemblance of a man! Give me the spirit.
 ~quotes on Soul by William Shakespeare

   We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business?
 ~sayings on Justice by Will Rogers

   Life is made up of sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating.
 ~quotations on Adversity by O. Henry

   love sucks!!!!
 ~funny hilarious quotes by phill the pill

   I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
 ~saying about hilarious by Henry David Thoreau, Solitude, Walden, 1854

   A man has every season while a woman only has the right to spring.
 ~quote about Feminism by Jane Fonda

   Make your life a masterpiece; imagine no limitations on what you can be, have or do.
 ~quotes on Determination by Brian Tracy

   The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.
 ~sayings on Happiness by Wayne W. Dyer

   While on a ladder, never step back to admire your work.
 ~quotations on Safety by Author Unknown

   The important thing is not so much that every child should be taught, as that every child should be given the wish to learn.
 ~funny hilarious quotes by John Lubbock

   Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible.

 ~saying about hilarious by Mother Teresa

   It is strange what a contempt men have for the joys that are offered them freely.
 ~quote about Happiness by Georges Duhamel

   If you want to take long walks, take long walks. If you want to hit things with sticks, hit things with sticks. But there's no excuse for combining the two and putting the results on TV. Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns.
 ~quotes on Golf by National Lampoon, 1979

   Street hockey is great for kids. It's energetic, competitive, and skilful. And best of all it keeps them off the street.
 ~sayings on Hockey by Author Unknown

   Strong belief generates the “can do”, the “can do” generates the “how to”.
 ~quotations on Self Improvement by

   Prayer gives a man the opportunity of getting to know a gentleman he hardly ever meets. I do not mean his maker, but himself.
 ~funny hilarious quotes by William Inge

   Fun I love, but too much fun is of all things the most loathsome. Mirth is better than fun, and happiness is better than mirth.
 ~saying about hilarious by Thomas Carlyle

   Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next.
 ~quote about Children by Franklin P. Jones

   The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
 ~quotes on Attitude by Anatole France

   Intuition is a spiritual faculty and does not explain, but simply points the way.
 ~sayings on Intuition by Florence Scovel Shinn

   Prayers not felt by us are seldom heard by God.
 ~quotations on Prayer by Philip Henry

   I haven't been able to slam-dunk the basketball for the past five years. Or, for the thirty-eight years before that, either.
 ~funny hilarious quotes by Dave Barry

   Maybe we should develop a Crayola bomb as our next secret weapon. A happiness weapon. A beauty bomb. And every time a crisis developed, we would launch one. It would explode high in the air - explode softly - and send thousands, millions, of little parachutes into the air. Floating down to earth - boxes of Crayolas. And we wouldn't go cheap, either - not little boxes of eight. Boxes of sixty-four, with the sharpener built right in. With silver and gold and copper, magenta and peach and lime, amber and umber and all the rest. And people would smile and get a little funny look on their faces and cover the world with imagination.
 ~saying about hilarious by Robert Fulghum

   Find a job for your hands and your nerves will find a job for themselves.
 ~quote about Career by

   The spend thrift is happy a few hours; the saver, all his life.
 ~quotes on Financial by
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