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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Peter O'Toole
      When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Kevin Gildea
      I bought an audio cleaning tape. I'm a big fan of theirs.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : unknown
      Black holes are when God tried to divide by zero.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Groucho Marx
      My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Unknown
      Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, and kill them.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Aesop
      We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Arthur James Balfour
      Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Melissa Stuart
      Smoking can kill. If your dead, you've lost a very important part of your life.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Art Buchwald
      Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven't been taxed before.

Type: Funny Quotes   Funny Sayings By: David Letterman
      Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving.

Type: Party Invitations   Funny Sayings By: Jack Handey?
      Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamedThen I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreamsIf I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be sha

Type: Happiness   Funny Sayings By: Thich Nhat Hanh
      Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.


Type: Missing You   Funny Sayings By: Lamartine
      Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated

Type: Sports   Funny Sayings By: Ernest Lawrence
      Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright; The band is playing somewhere; and somewhere hearts are light; And somewhere men are laughing; and little children shout; But there is no joy in Mudville- great Casey has struck out

Type: Groundhog Day   Funny Sayings By: George Herbert
      Every mile is two in winter

Type: Friendship   Funny Sayings By: 
      Most smiles are start by other smiles so smile first.

Type: Self Improvement   Funny Sayings By: 
      Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss, events happening; small minds, people things.

Type: Friendship   Funny Sayings By: 
      Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer. Almost any compromise is better than a lawsuit. All lasting agreements are made by compromise. Nothing made by brute force lasts.

Type: Famous Saying   Funny Sayings By: Ernest Hemingway
      Never mistake motion for action.

Type: Freedom   Funny Sayings By: John Fitzgerald Kennedy
      Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth

Type: Future   Funny Sayings By: Hugh Prather
      Every moment that I am centered in the future, I suffer a temporary loss of this life

Type: Love Sayings   Funny Sayings By: Lady Murasaki
      The memories of long love gather like drifting snow, poignant as the mandarin ducks who float side by side in sleep

Type: Success   Funny Sayings By: 
      Every morning say: I will improve something today. Every successful man is improvement – conscious.
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