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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Groucho Marx
      Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Lopez
      The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Tommy Cooper
      I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter.
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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Wilde
      I can resist anything but temptation.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Johnny Carson
      For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      Bugs are Sons of Glitches!

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Daniel J. Boorstin
      Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire PR officers.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.

Type: Chinese Saying   Funny Sayings By: Chinese
      If I hear I forget; If I see I remember; if I do I make it my own.

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: Brian Tracy
      The clearer you are about the consequences of your actions and the more intensely you desire to enjoy the consequences that your behaviors may lead to, the more motivated you will be.

Type: Sweetest Day   Funny Sayings By: Author Unknown
      I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catchers mitt on both handsYou need to be able to throw something back

Type: Sweetest Day   Funny Sayings By: Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
      While earning your daily bread, be sure you share a slice with those less fortunate

Type: Mothers Day   Funny Sayings By: Thomas Moore
      This heart, my own dear mother, bends,With love's true instinct, back to thee!

Type: Maturing Altruistically   Funny Sayings By: Dale Carnegie
      The ideas I stand for are not mine. I borrowed them from Socrates. I swiped them from Chesterfield. I stole them from Jesus. And I put them in a book. If you don't like their rules, whose would you use?

Type: I'm Sorry   Funny Sayings By: William Blake
      It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend

Type: Worry   Funny Sayings By: Robert Frost
       The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work

Type: Self Discipline   Funny Sayings By: Aesop
      It is easy to be brave from a safe distance.

Type: Veterans Day   Funny Sayings By: Dick Cheney
      It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from you

Type: Independence Day   Funny Sayings By: Dick Cheney
      It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from you

Type: Success   Funny Sayings By: 
      All great decisions were made without complete information, Now is the watchword of the great, the only time there is.

Type: Maturity   Funny Sayings By: Unknown
      The great French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree The gardener objected that the tree was slow growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years. The Marshall replied, In that case, there is no time to lose. Plant it this afternoon

Type: Patriotic   Funny Sayings By: Ulysses S. Grant
      Our great modern RepublicMay those who seek the blessings of its institutions and the protection of its flag remember the obligations they impose
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