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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Enoch Powell
      To write a diary every day is like returning to one's own vomit.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : David Brenner
      A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      Don't Take Life Seriously, It Is Not Permanent.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      I am at two with nature.

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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Unknown
      I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Humphrey Davy
      The art galleries of Paris contain the finest collection of frames I ever saw.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Jack Benny
      I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : David Letterman
      I'm just trying to make a smudge on the collective unconscious.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Robin Williams
      The Russians love Brooke Shields because her eyebrows remind them of Leonid Brezhnev.

Type: Fathers Day   Funny Sayings By: Bill Cosby
      Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope

Type: Children   Funny Sayings By: W. H. Auden
      Only those in the last stage of disease could believe that children are true judges of character

Type: Columbus Day   Funny Sayings By: Robert F. Kennedy
      Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly

Type: Motivation   Funny Sayings By: Mary Manin Morrissey author
      Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?

Type: Arbor Day   Funny Sayings By: Stephan Girard
      If I thought I was going to die tomorrow, I should nevertheless plant a tree today

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: George Bengis
      Nice, how we never get dizzy from doing good turns.

Type: Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By: Kevin Gildea
      I bought an audio cleaning tape. I'm a big fan of theirs.

Type: Comedy   Funny Sayings By: Steven Wright
      I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it

Type: Living   Funny Sayings By: Buddha
      Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.

Type: Romantic Quotes   Funny Sayings By: Goncourt
      Today I begin to understand what love must be, if it exists. When we are parted, we each feel the lack of the other half of ourselves. We are incomplete like a book in two volumes of which the first has been lost. That is what I imagine love to be: incompleteness in absence

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: Robert Brault
      Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true.

Type: Celebrity   Funny Sayings By: David Spade
      Wait, I just remembered something! You're boring and my legs work

Type: Election Day   Funny Sayings By: W.C. Fields
      Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against

Type: Famous Saying   Funny Sayings By: Cato the Elder
      After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.

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