Quote Type : Funny Saying Funny Quotes By : Groucho Marx My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
Quote Type : Funny Quotes Funny Quotes By : Unknown Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, and kill them.
Quote Type : Funny Saying Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
Quote Type : Humor Funny Quotes By : Aesop We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.
Quote Type : Funny Saying Funny Quotes By : Arthur James Balfour Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.
Quote Type : Humor Funny Quotes By : Melissa Stuart Smoking can kill. If your dead, you've lost a very important part of your life.
Type: Attitude Funny Sayings By: Mahatma Gandhi A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history.
Type: Emotions Funny Sayings By: To feel brave and cheerful, act brave and cheerful. Feeling will follow.
Type: Success Funny Sayings By: Hannibal We will either find a way, or make one.
Type: Celebrity Funny Sayings By: Howard Stern I still feel like I gotta prove something. There are a lot of people hoping I fail. But I like that. I need to be hated
Type: Thinking of You Funny Sayings By: John Burroughs I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read and all the friends I want to see
Type: Birthdays Funny Sayings By: Author Unknown I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now
Type: Friends Funny Sayings By: George Eliot No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reverence
Type: Friendship Funny Sayings By: Abraham Lincoln Quarrel not at all. No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention.
Type: Cool Funny Sayings By: Willa Cather I shall not die of a cold. I shall die of having lived
Type: Common sense Funny Sayings By: Myrtle Auvil Not all of us have to possess earthshaking talent Just common sense and love will do
Type: Famous Saying Funny Sayings By: Jesse Jackson Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment turns the state into a gay dungeon-master.
Type: Drinking Funny Sayings By: Britney Spears They'll talk about me showing cleavage and my belly, but they don't say anything about the artists who accept an award and can't even talk because they're so drugged out. After the awards show, I go home, drink my tea and go to bed
Type: Birthday Sayings Funny Sayings By: John Glenn For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday
Type: New Job Congrats Funny Sayings By: Author Unknown To kill time, a committee meeting is the perfect weapon