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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : George Carlin
      Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Peter O'Toole
      When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Kevin Gildea
      I bought an audio cleaning tape. I'm a big fan of theirs.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : unknown
      Black holes are when God tried to divide by zero.

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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Groucho Marx
      My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Unknown
      Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, and kill them.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Aesop
      We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Arthur James Balfour
      Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Melissa Stuart
      Smoking can kill. If your dead, you've lost a very important part of your life.

Type: Unknown   Funny Sayings By: 
      What was good enough yesterday isn't good enough today
What's good enough today won't be good enough tomorrow
Good enaogh.....isn't!

Type: Dreams   Funny Sayings By: James Dean
      Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today

Type: Death   Funny Sayings By: Mahatma Gandhi
      Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow

Type: Goodbye   Funny Sayings By: Kahlil Gibran
      Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation

Type: Love Quotes   Funny Sayings By: Kent Nerburn
      Love has its own time, its own season, and its own reasons from coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it or reason it into staying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you

Type: Living   Funny Sayings By: 
      Short as life is, we make it shorter by wasting time.

Type: New Year   Funny Sayings By: Thomas Mann
      Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunder-storm or blare of trumpets to announce the beginning of a new month or yearEven when a new century begins it is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols

Type: Romantic Quotes   Funny Sayings By: Katherine Hepburn
      Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything

Type: Adversity   Funny Sayings By: From the movie Old Yeller
      That was rough.... Thing to do now is try and forget it.... I guess I don't quite mean thatIt's not a thing you can forgetMaybe not even a thing you want to forget.... Life's like that sometimes... Now and then for no good reason a man can figure out, lif

Type: Proverbs   Funny Sayings By: Russian Proverb
      It's easier to tear a hole than to mend one.

Type: I'm Sorry   Funny Sayings By: Grace Hopper
      It's easier to ask forgiveness than it is to get permission

Type: Career   Funny Sayings By: 
      Daily ask yourself: How can I do this task quicker, cheaper, better, or more easily?

Type: Grandparents Day   Funny Sayings By: Sam Levenson
      The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is that they have a common enemy

Type: Missing You   Funny Sayings By: Author Unknown
      The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected

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