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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Grenville Kleiser
      Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keeps friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Alan Kay
       If you don't fail at least 90 percent of the time, you're not aiming high enough.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Anatole France
      If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Jessie Jackson
      A frustrated chicken should not vote for Colonel Sanders.

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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      So little time and so little to do.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Aldous Huxley
      The author of the Iliad is either Homer or, if not Homer, somebody else of the same name.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Ben Shahn
      An amateur is someone who supports himself with outside jobs which enable him to paint. A professional is someone whose wife works to enable him to paint.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Enoch Powell
      To write a diary every day is like returning to one's own vomit.

Type: Cute   Funny Sayings By: Jack Handey
      Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny

Type: Famous Saying   Funny Sayings By: Mark Twain
      A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Type: Mothers Day   Funny Sayings By: Tenneva Jordan
      A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie

Type: Cute   Funny Sayings By: Arnold Glasow
      Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects

Type: Fathers Day   Funny Sayings By: Enid Bagnold
      A father is always making his baby into a little womanAnd when she is a woman he turns her back again

Type: Famous Saying   Funny Sayings By: Benjamin Franklin
      Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.

Type: Happiness   Funny Sayings By: smiley
      Laughter is the cheapest tonic and vacation. It stirs the blood, exercises the chest, stimulates the nerves, chases grief, fear and wrath, wins friends, cures the blues, and gives all a cleansing rehabilitation.

Type: Graduation   Funny Sayings By: William Lyon Phelps
      Whenever it is possible, a boy should choose some occupation which he should do even if he did not need the money

Type: Independence Day   Funny Sayings By: Author Unknown
      I prefer liberty with danger to peace with slavery

Type: Success   Funny Sayings By: 
      A winner may not be more ambitious than a loser, but he’s ambitious longer.

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: Benjamin Franklin
      Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

Type: Weddings   Funny Sayings By: Emily Brontė
      Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same

Type: Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By: Oscar Wilde
      Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.

Type: Comedy   Funny Sayings By: Captain Gerald Coffee POW in Vietnam for seven years
      Laughter sets the spirit free to move through even the most tragic of circumstances. It helps us shake our heads clear, get our feet back under us, restoring our sense of balance and purpose. Humor is integral to our peace of mind and to our ability to go beyond survival

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