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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Grenville Kleiser
      Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keeps friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Alan Kay
       If you don't fail at least 90 percent of the time, you're not aiming high enough.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Anatole France
      If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Jessie Jackson
      A frustrated chicken should not vote for Colonel Sanders.
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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      So little time and so little to do.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Aldous Huxley
      The author of the Iliad is either Homer or, if not Homer, somebody else of the same name.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Ben Shahn
      An amateur is someone who supports himself with outside jobs which enable him to paint. A professional is someone whose wife works to enable him to paint.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Enoch Powell
      To write a diary every day is like returning to one's own vomit.

Type: Mothers Day   Funny Sayings By: Fran Lebowitz, "Parental Guidance," Social Studies, 1981
      Your responsibility as a parent is not as great as you might imagineYou need not supply the world with the next conqueror of disease or major motion-picture starIf your child simply grows up to be someone who does not use the word "collectible" as a noun,

Type: Baseball   Funny Sayings By: 
      The press box at Wrigley Field in Chicago is an extended narrow shed, two rows deep, that is precariously bolted to the iron rafters just underneath the park's second deck. To gain access, one must climb a steeply angled ramp and clamber down a little starboard companionway, guarded at its foot by a uniformed minion and then proceed giddily along a catwalk that hangs directly above the tiered, circling rows of seats and spectators behind home plate

Type: Common sense   Funny Sayings By: Beatrice Lillie
      Happiness for the average person may be said to flow largely from common sense -- adapting one-self to circumstances -- and a sense of humor

Type: Happiness   Funny Sayings By: 
      Happiness has little to do with what we have; everything with what we think.

Type: Adversity   Funny Sayings By: Marcel Proust, The Past Recaptured, Remembrance of Things Past
      Happiness is beneficial for the body but it is grief that develops the powers of the mind

Type: Happiness   Funny Sayings By: 
      Happiness is easy – dwell on things that make you glad; expel all thoughts that make you sad.

Type: Get Well Soon   Funny Sayings By: Johnny Carson
      Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill

Type: Proverbs   Funny Sayings By: Swedish Proverb
      Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more; talk less, say more; hate less, love more & all good things are yours.

Type: Weddings   Funny Sayings By: Mignon McLaughlin
      A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person

Type: Anniversaries   Funny Sayings By: Mignon McLaughlin
      A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person

Type: Graduation   Funny Sayings By: W.H. Auden
      A professor is someone who talks in someone else's sleep

Type: Compassion   Funny Sayings By: William Wordsworth
      That best portion of a good man's life; his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.

Type: Friendship   Funny Sayings By: 
      Your best protection from your enemies is to make them your friends.

Type: Books   Funny Sayings By: E. M. Forster
      I suggest that the only books that influence us are those for which we are ready, and which have gone a little further down our particular path than we have gone ourselves
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