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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : George Carlin
      Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Mel Brooks
      Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Alice Walker
      I'm always amazed that people will actually choose to sit in front of the television and just be savaged by stuff that belittles their intelligence.

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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : e. e. cummings
      I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      Your butt smells like chickenpoo but you sniff it anyway because it's there

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Grenville Kleiser
      Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keeps friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Alan Kay
       If you don't fail at least 90 percent of the time, you're not aiming high enough.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Anatole France
      If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Jessie Jackson
      A frustrated chicken should not vote for Colonel Sanders.

Type: Sweetest Day   Funny Sayings By: Sara Ebenreck, American Forests
      Trees outstrip most people in the extent and depth of their work for the public good

Type: Arbor Day   Funny Sayings By: Sara Ebenreck, American Forests
      Trees outstrip most people in the extent and depth of their work for the public good

Type: Love Quotes   Funny Sayings By: Wayne W. Dyer
      Give love and unconditional acceptance to those you encounter, and notice what happens

Type: Celebrity   Funny Sayings By: David Schwimmer
      True love can not be found where it does not truely exist; nor can it be hidden where it does

Type: Valentine's Day   Funny Sayings By: Erich Segal
      True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lightsIf you hear bells, get your ears checked

Type: Valentine's Day   Funny Sayings By: Pedro Calderon de la Barca
      When love is not madness, it is not love

Type: Valentine's Day   Funny Sayings By: Richard Bach
      True love stories never have endings

Type: Commitment Ceremonies   Funny Sayings By: Richard Bach
      True love stories never have endings

Type: Anniversaries   Funny Sayings By: Richard Bach
      True love stories never have endings

Type: Memorial Day   Funny Sayings By: Henry Ward Beecher
      They hover as a cloud of witnesses above this Nation

Type: Party Invitations   Funny Sayings By: From the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off
      Life moves pretty fastIf you don't stop to look around once in a while you could miss it

Type: Living   Funny Sayings By: Alice Walker
      Time moves slowly, but passes quickly

Type: Earth Day   Funny Sayings By: Dennis Gabor, Inventing the Future, 1963
      Till now man has been up against Nature; from now on he will be up against his own nature

Type: Famous Saying   Funny Sayings By: Voltaire
      Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.

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