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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Mel Brooks
      I'm a man of the world, Andy. Why, I've even been to Raleigh!

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : 
      Don't look back, they might be gaining on you.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Denis Leary
      Jerry Lewis has been married twenty times. He gets married on a Tuesday, they find his wife dead in a swimming pool on Thursday. Maybe if you married someone who's old enough to swin next time, OK Jerry?

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Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Wilde
      I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Randy Gilbert
      If genius is one percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration, I wind up sharing elevators with a lot of bright people

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Oliver Herford
      The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Ed Gardner
      Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Carolyn
      Jesus is like Sugar..

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Romain Gary
      Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.

Type: Birthdays   Funny Sayings By: Charles Schulz
      Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: 
      Our enemies’ opinion of us is more accurate then our own.

Type: I'm Sorry   Funny Sayings By: Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
      True remorse is never just a regret over consequence; it is a regret over motive

Type: Mothers Day   Funny Sayings By: Lionel Kauffman
      Children are a great comfort in your old age - and they help you reach it faster, too

Type: Family   Funny Sayings By: Ralph Waldo Emerson
      Children are all foreigners.

Type: Death   Funny Sayings By: Edward W. Howe
      Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them

Type: Baby   Funny Sayings By: Select Panel for the Promotion of Child Health, 1981
      Children are one third of our population and all of our future

Type: Women's Greetings   Funny Sayings By: Maureen Murphy
      Some men are so macho they'll get you pregnant just to kill a rabbit

Type: Maturity   Funny Sayings By: Leo Rosten
      Most men do not mature, they simply grow taller

Type: Determination   Funny Sayings By: Polybius
      Some men give up their designs when they have almost reached the goal; while others, on the contrary, obtain a victory by exerting, at the last moment, more vigorous efforts than before.

Type: Children   Funny Sayings By: Joseph Joubert
      Children have more need of models, than of critics

Type: Family   Funny Sayings By: Jesse Jackson
      Children need your presence more than your presents.

Type: Retirement   Funny Sayings By: Gail Sheehy
      When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to piecesWomen go right on cooking

Type: Dreams   Funny Sayings By: George Bernard Shaw
      Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not

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