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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Brian Tracy
      The amount you laugh in your relationships with others is the true measure of the health of your personality.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Wilde
      One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Luis Bunuel
      Salvador Dali seduced many ladies, particularly American ladies, but these seductions usually consisted of stripping them naked in his apartment, frying a couple of eggs, putting them on the woman's shoulders and, without a word, showing them the door.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Drew Barrymore
      I no longer have the fear of being alone. It's cool to find out that you don't need a boyfriend to be happy.

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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : John Mendosa
      Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Frank Zappa
      Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      I am no more humble than my talents require.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Alfred Hitchcock
      The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.

Type: Maturing Altruistically   Funny Sayings By: Pythagoras
      Choose always the way that seems the best, however rough it may be. Custom will soon render it easy and agreeable.

Type: Birthday Sayings   Funny Sayings By: Gertrude Stein
      We are always the same age inside

Type: Christmas   Funny Sayings By: Charles Dickens
      I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round, as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and

Type: Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By: Hilliare Belloc
      When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.

Type: Anniversaries   Funny Sayings By: H.L. Mencken, A Book of Burlesques, 1916
      Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him

Type: Personality   Funny Sayings By: 
      A kind and courteous “no” hurts less than a rude “yes”.

Type: Missing You   Funny Sayings By: George Lansdowne
      To die and part is a less evil; but to part and live, there, there is the torment

Type: Goodbye   Funny Sayings By: George Lansdowne
      To die and part is a less evil; but to part and live, there, there is the torment

Type: Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By: Steven Wright.
      What's another word for thesaurus?

Type: Baby   Funny Sayings By: Charles Osgood
      Babies are always more trouble than you thought - and more wonderful

Type: Patriotic   Funny Sayings By: Author Unknown
      If you are ashamed to stand by your colors, you had better seek another flag

Type: Living   Funny Sayings By: Art Buchwald
      People are broad-minded. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn't drive, there's something wrong with him.

Type: Self Discipline   Funny Sayings By: John Ruskin
      People are eternally divided into two classes, the believer, builder, and praiser, and the unbeliever, destroyer and critic.

Type: Retirement   Funny Sayings By: Tommy Bolt
      If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up

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