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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Luis Bunuel
      Salvador Dali seduced many ladies, particularly American ladies, but these seductions usually consisted of stripping them naked in his apartment, frying a couple of eggs, putting them on the woman's shoulders and, without a word, showing them the door.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Drew Barrymore
      I no longer have the fear of being alone. It's cool to find out that you don't need a boyfriend to be happy.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : John Mendosa
      Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.

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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Woody Allen
      Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Frank Zappa
      Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      I am no more humble than my talents require.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Alfred Hitchcock
      The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Mark Twain
      Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : David Letterman
      Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.

Type: New Year   Funny Sayings By: Hartley Coleridge
      The merry year is born,Like the bright berry from the naked thorn.

Type: Patriot Day   Funny Sayings By: François Fénelon
      All wars are civil wars, because all men are brothers

Type: Unknown   Funny Sayings By: 
      All wars have innocents

Type: Financial   Funny Sayings By: 
      The curse of extravagance kills more opportunities than taxes, sickness and hard time.

Type: Dance   Funny Sayings By: Diogenes
      Discourse on virtue and they pass by in droves. Whistle and dance the shimmy, and you've got an audience

Type: Graduation   Funny Sayings By: A. Lawrence Lowell
      Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates

Type: Love   Funny Sayings By: Pearl S. Buck
      The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration.

Type: Sweetest Day   Funny Sayings By: Ludwig Feuerbach, The Essence of Christianity
      The first and highest law must be the love of man to manHomo homini Deus est - this is the supreme practical maxim, this is the turning point of the world's History

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: Pablo Picasso
       My first drawings could never have been shown at an exhibition of children’s drawings. I lacked the clumsiness of a child, his naivety.

Type: Birthdays   Funny Sayings By: Jerry M. Wright
      The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left

Type: Women's Greetings   Funny Sayings By: Lupe Velez
      The first time you buy a house you see how pretty the paint is and buy itThe second time you look to see if the basement has termitesIt's the same with men

Type: Missing You   Funny Sayings By: George Linley
      Thou art gone from my gaze like a beautiful dream.And I seek thee in vain by the meadow and stream.

Type: Sympathy   Funny Sayings By: Kahlil Gibran
      Oh heart, if one should say to you that the soul perishes like the body, answer that the flower withers, but the seed remains

Type: Baseball   Funny Sayings By: Danny Murtaugh
      Why certainly I'd like to have that fellow who hits a home run every time at bat, who strikes out every opposing batter when he's pitching, who throws strikes to any base or the plate when he's playing outfield and who's always thinking about two innings ahead just what he'll do to baffle the other team. Any manager would want a guy like that playing for him. The only trouble is to get him to put down his cup of beer and come down out of the stands and do those things

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