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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Randy Gilbert
      If genius is one percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration, I wind up sharing elevators with a lot of bright people

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Oliver Herford
      The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Ed Gardner
      Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Carolyn
      Jesus is like Sugar..
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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Romain Gary
      Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.

Quote Type : Funny Quotes   Funny Quotes By : Oscar Levant
      I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : H.L. Mencken
      Opera in English is, in the main, just about as sensible as baseball in Italian.

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : George Carlin
      Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

Quote Type : Humor   Funny Quotes By : Peter O'Toole
      When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Quotes By : Kevin Gildea
      I bought an audio cleaning tape. I'm a big fan of theirs.

Type: Graduation   Funny Sayings By: Judy Garland
      Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else

Type: Mothers Day   Funny Sayings By: Marcel Proust
      Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom

Type: For a Friend   Funny Sayings By: Marcel Proust
      Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom

Type: Anniversaries   Funny Sayings By: Marcel Proust
      Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom

Type: April Fool's Day   Funny Sayings By: Mark Twain
      Let us be thankful for the foolsBut for them the rest of us could not succeed

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: Martin Luther King, Jr.
      It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can stop him from lynching me, and I think that's pretty important.

Type: Creativity   Funny Sayings By: chris aleke
      always be what nature made t be for nature cares for you

Type: Attitude   Funny Sayings By: Aesop
      Better be wise by the misfortunes of others than by your own.

Type: Success   Funny Sayings By: Abraham Lincoln
      Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any one thing.

Type: Books   Funny Sayings By: Eudora Welty
      It had been startling and disappointing to me to find out that story books had been written by people, that books were not natural wonders, coming of themselves like grass

Type: Veterans Day   Funny Sayings By: Mark Twain, Notebook, 1935
      In the beginning of a change, the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scornedWhen his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot

Type: Love Sayings   Funny Sayings By: Duane Allman
      I love being alive and will be the best man I possibly can. I will take love wherever I find it and offer it to everyone who will take it. I will seek knowledge from those wiser and teach those who wish to learn from me

Type: Weddings   Funny Sayings By: Rita Rudner
      I love being marriedIt's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life

Type: Self Improvement   Funny Sayings By: 
      Strong belief generates the “can do”, the “can do” generates the “how to”.
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