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sarcastic quotes for your Self help needs

   Can anyone remember when times were not hard and money was scare?
 ~quote about Financial by

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   Man performs and engenders so much more than he can or should have to bear. That's how he finds that he can bear anything.
 ~quotes on Adversity by William Faulkner

   Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.
 ~sayings on Gifts by William Arthur Ward

   All of the biggest technological inventions created by man - the airplane, the automobile, the computer - says little about his intelligence, but speaks volumes about his laziness.
 ~quotations on Prosperity by Mark Kennedy

   Coolidge was known for his terse speech and reticence. A woman bet her friend that she could get Coolidge to speak to her, which was something he was reluctant to do. She went up to him and said: Hello, Mr. President, I bet my friend that I could get you to say three words to me. You lose, Coolidge replied dryly, and walked away.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Author Unknown

   It is only by softening and disguising dead flesh by culinary preparation that it is rendered susceptible of mastication or digestion, and that the sight of its bloody juices and raw horror does not excite intolerable loathing and disgust.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Percy Bysshe Shelley, Queen Mab Notes

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   When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn
 ~quote about Hang in There by Harriet Beecher Stowe

   It is as grandmothers that our mothers come into the fullness of their grace.
 ~quotes on Grandparents by Christopher Morley

   We're Americans - with a capital A! And do you know what that means? Do you? It means that our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world.
 ~sayings on America by From the movie Stripes

   If you're not careful, the newspapers will have you hating the people who are being oppressed, and loving the people who are doing the oppressing.
 ~quotations on Media Journalism by Malcolm X

   This nation was built by men who took risks - pioneers who were not afraid of the wilderness, business men who were not afraid of failure, scientists who were not afraid of the truth, thinkers who were not afraid of progress, dreamers who were not afraid of action.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Brooks Atkinson

    Hungry not only for bread -- but hungry for love. Naked not only for clothing -- but naked for human dignity and respect. Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks -- but homeless because of rejection.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Mother Teresa

   Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you.
 ~quote about Summer by Erma Bombeck

   It is foolish to tear one's hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less by baldness.
 ~quotes on Adversity by Cicero

   No country is so wild and difficult but men will make it a theater of war.
 ~sayings on War by Ambrose Bierce

   He who travels in search of something which he has not got, travels away from himself and grows old even in youth among old things.
 ~quotations on Being Yourself by Ralph Waldo Emerson, Self-Reliance

   The fireworks begin todayEach diploma is a lighted matchEach one of you is a fuse
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Edward Koch

   I am in favor of preserving the French habit of kissing ladies' hands - after all, one must start somewhere.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Sacha Guitry

   Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons.
 ~quote about Carpe Diem by Ruth Ann Schabacker

   Most unhappy and frustrated people are that way because they’re trying to do something nature didn’t equip them for.
 ~quotes on Career by

   When you're a young man, Macbeth is a character part. When you're older, it's a straight part.
 ~sayings on Age by Laurence Olivier

   It's sad to grow old, but nice to ripen.
 ~quotations on Age by Brigitte Bardot

   It is easy to ignore responsibility when one is only an intermediate link in a chain of action.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Stanley Milgram

   Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Winston Churchill

   In a 'USA Today' interview, Vanna White said since her son has been born, she wants to work less. Vanna, you turn *tiles* for a living. If you worked any less, you'd be the triangle player in the 'K.C. and the Sunshine Band
 ~quote about Celebrity by Dennis Miller

   Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down
 ~quotes on For a Friend by Oprah Winfrey

   It isn't the whistle that pulls the train.

Saying is one thing and doing another.

 ~sayings on Determination by Vermont Proverb

   What about football? Is it a sport or a concussion?
 ~quotations on American football by Jim Murray, Los Angeles Times

   In every part and corner of our life, to lose oneself is to be the gainer; to forget oneself is to be happy.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Robert Louis Stevenson

   A classic is a book that has never finished saying what it has to say.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Italo Calvino, The Literature Machine

   I only went out for a walk and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found, was really going in
 ~quote about Earth Day by John Muir, 1913, in L.M. Wolfe, ed., John Muir, John of the Mountains: The Unpublished Journals of

   Novelists... fashioning nets to sustain and support the reader as he falls helplessly through the chaos of his own existence.
 ~quotes on Writing by Fay Weldon

   It is by riding a bicycle that you learn the contours of a country best, since you have to sweat up the hills and coast down them. Thus you remember them as they actually are, while in a motor car only a high hill impresses you, and you have no such accurate remembrance of country you have driven through as you gain by riding a bicycle.
 ~sayings on Bicycling by Ernest Hemingway

   It is not a man's duty, as a matter of course, to devote himself to the eradication of any, even the most enormous wrong; he may still properly have other concerns to engage him; but it is his duty, at least, to wash his hands of it, and, if he gives it no thought longer, not to give it practically his support. If I devote myself to other pursuits and contemplations, I must first see, at least, that I do not pursue them sitting upon another man's shoulders.
 ~quotations on Civil Disobedience by Henry David Thoreau, On the Duty of Civil Disobedience

   Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Mark Twain, Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar for 1894

   Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Mother Teresa

   Love: Two minds without a single thought
 ~quote about Love by Philip Barry

   All of the biggest technological inventions created by man - the airplane, the automobile, the computer - says little about his intelligence, but speaks volumes about his laziness.
 ~quotes on Laziness by Mark Kennedy

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