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sarcastic quotes for your Self help needs

   If only we'd stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.
 ~quote about Happiness by Edith Wharton

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   The supreme accomplishment is to blur the line between work and play.
 ~quotes on Jobs by Arnold Toynbee

   I like the word indolence. It makes my laziness seem classy.
 ~sayings on Laziness by Bern Williams

   Blink and you miss a sprint. The 10,000 meters is lap after lap of waiting. Theatrically, the mile is just the right length - beginning, middle, end: a story unfolding.
 ~quotations on Running by Sebastian Coe

   Maybe nature is fundamentally ugly, chaotic and complicated. But if it's like that, then I want out.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Steven Weinberg

   Poets are mysterious, but a poet when all is said is not much more mysterious than a banker.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Allen Tate

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   Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside.
 ~quote about Alcohol by Author Unknown

   It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven't lost the things that money can't buy.
 ~quotes on Money by George Horace Lorimer

   And even if you were in some prison, the walls of which let none of the sounds of the world come to your senses - would you not then still have your childhood, that precious, kingly possession, that treasure-house of memories?
 ~sayings on Memory by Rainer Maria Rilke

   Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared.
 ~quotations on Courage by Edward Vernon Rickenbacker

   For the man sound in body and serene of mind there is no such thing as bad weather; every day has its beauty, and storms which whip the blood do but make it pulse more vigorously.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by George Gissing, Winter, The Private Papers of Henry Ryecroft, 1903

   There are fools, damn fools, and those who remount in a steeplechase.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Bill Whitbread

   The third major characteristic of God - infinitude - is the catchall, the universal modifier of Christian theology. God is not merely a being; he is infinite being. God is not merely good; he is infinite goodness. God is not merely wise; he is infinite wisdom. And so on down the list. God is exaggeration run amuck.
 ~quote about Religion by George H. Smith, Atheism: The Case Against God

   Those who turn to God for comfort may find comfort but I do not think they will find God.
 ~quotes on God by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   I know the Virginia players are smart because you need a 1500 SAT to get in. I have to drop bread crumbs to get our players to and from class
 ~sayings on Basketball by George Raveling

   Peace begins with a smile.
 ~quotations on Happiness by Mother Teresa

   Wars usually have the effect of speeding up the process of history.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Pieter Geyl, Debates With Historians

   Forethought and temperance are the virtues which produced thrift, and with thrift the economic progress of society. And those are the virtues which today are gravely compromised.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Adriano Tilgher

   Our siblings. They resemble us just enough to make all their differences confusing, and no matter what we choose to make of this, we are cast in relation to them our whole lives long.
 ~quote about Sisters by Susan Scarf Merrell

   The best reason for having dreams is that in dreams no reasons are necessary.
 ~quotes on Dreams by Ashleigh Brilliant

   Love your enemies. It makes them so damned mad.
 ~sayings on Humorous by P.D. East

   Great scientific discoveries have been made by men seeking to verify quite erroneous theories about the nature of things.
 ~quotations on Science by Aldous Huxley, Wordsworth in the Tropics

   Abstainer, n. A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911

   Be thankful that God's answers are wiser than your answers.
 ~saying about sarcastic by William Culbertson

   All my best thoughts were stolen by the ancients.
 ~quote about Miscellaneous by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.
 ~quotes on Kindness by John Wooden

   You can't run away from trouble. There ain't no place that far.
 ~sayings on Adversity by Uncle Remus

   Yeah, after each of my downhill putts.
 ~quotations on Golf by Homero Blancas, asked if he had any uphill putts

   Man is harder than iron, stronger than stone and more fragile than a rose.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by Turkish Proverb

   What we remember from childhood we remember forever - permanent ghosts, stamped, inked, imprinted, eternally seen.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Cynthia Ozick

   Leisure tends to corrupt, and absolute leisure corrupts absolutely.
 ~quote about Leisure by Edgar A. Shoaff

   God is an unutterable sigh, planted in the depths of the soul.
 ~quotes on God by Jean Paul Richter

   An apology is the superglue of lifeIt can repair just about anything
 ~sayings on I'm Sorry by Lynn Johnston

   It takes a long time to become young.
 ~quotations on Age by Pablo Picasso

   A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.
 ~funny quotes sarcastic by David Brenner

   Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day.
 ~saying about sarcastic by Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

   Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.
 ~quote about Women by Laurence J. Peter

   Any member introducing a dog into the Society's premises shall be liable to a fine of one pound. Any animal leading a blind person shall be deemed to be a cat.
 ~quotes on Dogs by Oxford Union Society, London, Rule 46

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