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funny sayings for your Self help needs

   Personality can open doors; only character can keep them open.
 ~quote about Personality by
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   Football is like life, it requires perseverance, self-denial, hard work sacrifice, dedication and respect for authority
 ~quotes on Football by Vince Lombardi

   Middle age: When you're sitting at home on Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.
 ~sayings on Telephones by Ogden Nash

   Is not a kiss the very autograph of love?
 ~quotations on Kisses by Henry Finck

   The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others.
 ~funny saying quotes by Author Unknown

   I'm cute in gym shorts! I'm slim and trim, and you'd be impressed - I've good calves
 ~saying about funny by Larry King
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   A morning without coffee is like sleep.
 ~quote about Caffeine by Author Unknown

   No news is good news. No journalists is even better.
 ~quotes on Media Journalism by Nicolas Bentley

   Science has never drummed up quite as effective a tranquilizing agent as a sunny spring day.
 ~sayings on Spring by W. Earl Hall

   Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop to look around once in a while you could miss it.
 ~quotations on Carpe Diem by From the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off

   Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker
 ~funny saying quotes by Author Unknown

   Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.
 ~saying about funny by Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

   We cannot carry our father's corpse with us everywhere we go.
 ~quote about Living by Guillaume Apollinaire, The Cubist Painters, 1913

   Mistress: something between a mister and a mattress.
 ~quotes on Marriage by Author Unknown

   Nothing risqué, nothing gained.
 ~sayings on Sex by Alexander Woollcott

   Among my most prized possessions are words that I have never spoken.
 ~quotations on Speaking by Orson Rega Card

   I cannot forget my mother. [S]he is my bridge. When I needed to get across, she steadied herself long enough for me to run across safely.
 ~funny saying quotes by Renita Weems

   Never set a standar in the love your looking for coz you'll end up eating your words. For love comes with the unlikely person and if you ask God why? He will answer: LOVE JUST MOVES IN A MYSTERIOUS WAYS!!!
 ~saying about funny by Judith >"'<

   Why should man expect his prayer for mercy to be heard by What is above him when he shows no mercy to what is under him?
 ~quote about Environment by Pierre Troubetzkoy

   I would not exchange my leisure hours for all the wealth in the world.
 ~quotes on Leisure by Comte de Mirabeau

   Good habits are hard to acquire but easy to live with.
 ~sayings on Personality by

   The happiest hours of mankind are recorded on the blank pages of history.
 ~quotations on History by Thomas Carlyle, Life of Frederick the Great

   I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school.
 ~funny saying quotes by Author Unknown

   What is true by lamplight is not always true by sunlight.
 ~saying about funny by Joseph Joubert

   Sun salutations can energize and warm you, even on the darkest, coldest winter day.
 ~quote about Yoga by Carol Krucoff

   We need an America with the wisdom of experienceBut we must not let America grow old in spirit
 ~quotes on Patriotic by Hubert H. Humphrey

   Do not put your faith in what statistics say until you have carefully considered what they do not say.
 ~sayings on Statistics by William W. Watt

   The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like computers.
 ~quotations on Technology by Sydney J. Harris

   For every fact there is an infinity of hypotheses.
 ~funny saying quotes by Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, 1974

   Hair is vitally personal to children. They weep vigorously when it is cut for the first time; no matter how it grows, bushy, straight or curly, they feel they are being shorn of a part of their personality.
 ~saying about funny by Charles Chaplin, My Autobiography, 1964

   A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying... that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
 ~quote about Perspective by Alexander Pope, in Swift, Miscellanies

   I prefer the word homemaker, because housewife always implies that there may be a wife someplace else.
 ~quotes on Women by Bella Abzug

   No rage is equal to the rage of a contented right-thinking man when he is confronted in the marketplace by an idea which belongs in the pulpit.
 ~sayings on Religion by Thurman W. Arnold

   A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
 ~quotations on Famous Saying by Paul Valery

   The hardest thing to do in baseball is to hit a round baseball with a round bat, squarely
 ~funny saying quotes by Ted Williams

   If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed.
 ~saying about funny by Lily Tomlin

   The first and highest law must be the love of man to man. Homo homini Deus est - this is the supreme practical maxim, this is the turning point of the world's History.
 ~quote about Kindness by Ludwig Feuerbach, The Essence of Christianity

   For, after all, put it as we may to ourselves, we are all of us from birth to death guests at a table which we did not spread. The sun, the earth, love, friends, our very breath are parts of the banquet.... Shall we think of the day as a chance to come nearer to our Host, and to find out something of Him who has fed us so long?
 ~quotes on God by Rebecca Harding Davis
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