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Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Hilliare Belloc
      When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Hunter S. Thompson
      I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Terry Pratchett
      Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Oliver Herford
      The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet.

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Quote Type : Humor   Funny Sayings By : Frank Zappa
      Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Ed Gardner
      Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Mick Miller
      I went to watch Pavarotti once. He doesn't like it when you join in.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Kevin Gildea
      I bought an audio cleaning tape. I'm a big fan of theirs.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Noel Coward
      People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It is what it used to be. That is what's wrong with it.

Quote Type : Funny Saying   Funny Sayings By : Denis Leary
      Jerry Lewis has been married twenty times. He gets married on a Tuesday, they find his wife dead in a swimming pool on Thursday. Maybe if you married someone who's old enough to swin next time, OK Jerry?

Type: Friendship   Quotes By: Ben Franklin
      A brother may not be a friend, but a friend will always be a brother.

Type: Funny Saying   Quotes By: Groucho Marx
      My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.

Type: Friends   Quotes By: Lee Iacocca
      My father always used to say that when you die, if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life

Type: Graduation   Quotes By: Jim Fox
      My father always told me, "Find a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life."

Type: Teacher Appreciation   Quotes By: Henry Adams
      A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops

Type: Attitude   Quotes By: Art Buchwald
      Just when you think there's nothing to write about, Nixon says, "I am not a crook." Jimmy Carter says, "I have lusted after women in my heart." President Reagan says, "I have just taken a urinalysis test, and I am not on dope."

Type: Earth Day   Quotes By: Cree Indian Proverb
      Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realise we cannot eat money

Type: Arbor Day   Quotes By: Cree Indian Proverb
      Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realise we cannot eat money

Type: Financial   Quotes By: 
      Save when prosperous. There’s little fear of overspending when we’re not.

Type: Baby   Quotes By: Fran Lebowitz
      Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky

Type: Goodbye   Quotes By: Lord Byron
      Fare thee well! and if for ever,Still for ever, fare thee well.

Type: Baseball   Quotes By: Dave Bristol
      Yeah, he's in pain except between the first and ninth innings

Type: Relationship   Quotes By: 
      Half the world’s troubles come from saying yes too soon and to often and no too late and to seldom.

Type: Valentine's Day   Quotes By: Pearl Bailey
      What the world really needs is more love and less paper work

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