Motivational Comedy Sayings & Quotes

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      A Craftsman polishes his work, but a Comedian polishes his errors
Author: Tony Follari

      Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he isn't. A sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is
Author: Horace Walpole

      Optimism and humor are the grease and glue of life. Without both of them we would never have survived our captivity
Author: Philip Butler, Vietnam POW
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      Laughter sets the spirit free to move through even the most tragic of circumstances. It helps us shake our heads clear, get our feet back under us, restoring our sense of balance and purpose. Humor is integral to our peace of mind and to our ability to go beyond survival
Author: Captain Gerald Coffee POW in Vietnam for seven years

      A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs, jolted by every pebble in the road
Author: Henry Ward Beecher

      A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your step as you walk the tightrope of life
Author: William Arthur Ward

      Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility
Author: James Thurber

      Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot
Author: Charlie Chaplin

      Comedy is tragedy plus time
Author: Carol Burnett

      (Referring to a glass of water) I mixed this myself. Two parts H, one part O. I don't trust anybody
Author: Steven Wright

      I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it
Author: Steven Wright

      Humor is just another defense against the universe
Author: Mel Brooks

      Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died
Author: Steven Wright

      Everybody says that comedy is harder to do. That's become a truism by now, but it's wrong. Comedy is not harder. The hardest thing is to do good work, whatever it is
Author: Woody Allen

      All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world was tranquil, without disease and violence, I'd be standing on the breadline right in back of J. Edgar Hoover
Author: Lenny Bruce

      OK, so what's the speed of dark
Author: Steven Wright

      If you can look into the mirror without laughter, you have no sense of humor
Author: Unknown

      A sense of humor is the lubricant of life's machinery
Author: Unknown

      One day while Groucho Marx was working in his garden (dressed in well-worn gardening attire), a wealthy woman pulled up in a Cadillac and endeavored to persuade the gardener to come and work for her. How much does the lady of the house pay you? she asked. Oh, I don't get paid in dollars, Groucho replied, glancing up. The lady of the house just a lets me sleep with her
Author: Groucho Marx

      You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything - even poverty - you can survive it
Author: Bill Cosby

      You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Author: Steven Wright

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