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joke sayings for your Self help needs

   If God wanted us to be brave, why did He give us legs?
 ~quote about Courage by Marvin Kitman
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   There must be a day or two in a man's life when he is the precise age for something important.
 ~quotes on Age by Franklin P. Adams

   Kids ought to have two bicycles, one to ride and one to rent.
 ~sayings on Entrepreneurism by Jim Rohn

   Knowledge is the true organ of sight, not the eyes.
 ~quotations on Knowledge by Panchatantra

   We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey
 ~joke and funny saying by Kenji Miyazawa

   Why should man expect his prayer for mercy to be heard by What is above him when he shows no mercy to what is under him?
 ~saying about joke by Pierre Troubetzkoy
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   Save when prosperous. There’s little fear of overspending when we’re not.
 ~quote about Financial by

   Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in loveI'd stepped in it a few times
 ~quotes on Valentine's Day by Rita Rudner

   Teaching people skills without giving them a vision for a better future a vision based on common values -- is only training
 ~sayings on Future by Nido Qubein

   The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook.
 ~quotations on Wisdom by William James

   Boredom is a sickness the cure for which is work; pleasure is only a palliative.
 ~joke and funny saying by Le Duc de Lévis, Mémoires

   No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office.
 ~saying about joke by George Bernard Shaw

   In a man's letters his soul lies naked.
 ~quote about Letters by Samuel Johnson

   Man is the only animal for whom his own existence is a problem which he has to solve.
 ~quotes on Humankind by Erich Fromm, Man for Himself, 1947

   History is philosophy teaching by examples.
 ~sayings on History by Thucydides, The History of the Peloponnesian War

   In my youth, I stressed freedom, and in my old age I stress order. I have made the great discovery that liberty is a product of order
 ~quotations on Freedom by Will Durant

   Some marriages break up, and some do not, and in our world you can usually explain the former better than the latter.
 ~joke and funny saying by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.
 ~saying about joke by Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

   The supreme philosophy is fortitude, self-mastery. To become a money master, or success master, we must first become self-masters.
 ~quote about Self Discipline by

   No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.
 ~quotes on Happiness by Barbara De Angelis

   Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
 ~sayings on Business by Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

   Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
 ~quotations on Alcohol by W.C. Fields

   A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.
 ~joke and funny saying by Herbert Prochnow

   Art hath an enemy called ignorance.
 ~saying about joke by Ben Jonson

   A lot of guys have had a lot of fun joking about Henry Ford because he admitted one time that he didn't know history. He don't know it, but history will know him. He has made more history than his critics ever read.
 ~quote about History by Will Rogers

   We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for. Dead Poet's Society
 ~quotes on Poetry by

   What we have are good gray ballplayers, playing a good gray game and reading the good gray Wall Street Journal. They have been brainwashed, dry-cleaned and dehydrated!... Wake up the echoes at the Hall of Fame and you will find that baseball's immortals were a rowdy and raucous group of men who would climb down off their plaques and go rampaging through Cooperstown, taking spoils.... Deplore it if you will, but Grover Cleveland Alexander drunk was a better pitcher than Grover Cleveland Alexander sober.
 ~sayings on Baseball by Bill Veeck, The Hustler's Handbook

   Serenity of spirit and turbulence of action should make up the sum of a man's life.
 ~quotations on Life by Vita Sackville-West

   First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly
 ~joke and funny saying by Branch Rickey

   Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.
 ~saying about joke by Lao Tzu

   I will follow the right side even to the fire, but excluding the fire if I can.
 ~quote about Integrity by Michel de Montaigne, translated

   Science has made us gods even before we are worthy of being men.
 ~quotes on Science by Jean Rostand

   You cannot be both fashionable and first-rate.
 ~sayings on Conformity by Logan Pearsall Smith

   Mankind have banned the Divinity from their presence; they have relegated him to a sanctuary; the walls of the temple restrict his view; he does not exist outside of it.
 ~quotations on Religion by Diderot, Pensées philosophiques, 1746

   Clapping with the right hand only will not produce a noise.
 ~joke and funny saying by Malay

   Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
 ~saying about joke by Herbert Asquith

   To tell a woman everything she may not do is to tell her what she can do.
 ~quote about Feminism by Spanish Proverb

   Studies by Medical Corps psychiatrists of combat fatigue cases... found that fear of killing, rather than fear of being killed, was the most common cause of battle failure, and that fear of failure ran a strong second.
 ~quotes on War by S.L.A. Marshall
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